Poetry

Why gnomes wear diving helmets.

It was all going peacefully, life.

Or so the gnomes thought.

Then one day the gnome king announced

that gnomes were a fragile species,

and garden and ornamental, bearded and not,

should wear diving helmets for protection until further notice.

Gnome kind grumbled and groaned,

and some flatly refused to adapt their style –

why cover up their signature ruddy cheeks and bright caps that had remained unchanged throughout the ages?

Then the kids playing in the school field across the road

kicked their football too high,

which swiftly decapitated an unprotected gnome

in the final arc of its descent.

The other gnomes were sad, but it was a chance in…well, however many gnomes their were!

There was more probability that their paint would flake and smiles crack

before a tragedy like that would occur again.

But they didn’t account for the glorious sun,

which brought footballs raining down ten a day

leaving only those gnomes with helmets on

safe from the barrage.